Black Wednesday at the Gym

Today is Wednesday, January 2, 2013, the day when every person on the planet will exercise, go to the gym, or enroll in a ridiculously overpriced gym contract.

I love how people who haven’t pushed away a plate in eight years will now be hell bent on pushing weight.

Living and promoting a healthy lifestyle is terrific, but I’m not a strong believer in New Year’s resolutions. The first day of the year is a great way to hit the reset button on life and start doing things the right way, but that kind of outlook and attitude should be used year-round.

Today though, I will suffer. I will go to the basketball courts and instead of jumping straight into a game, I’ll be faced with an hour-long wait because some kid who got Jordans for Christmas decided that today would be a great day to break them in. The line for cardio will look as if the equipment is being given away for free. Weight lifting? Forget about it. Today, everyone will be training for Mr. Olympia.

I wish that I was a gym owner or a personal trainer milking the cash cow that is new members trying to fit in their two sizes too small spandex.

The gym floor will undoubtedly look like a freshman class of high schoolers aimlessly wondering off to machinery they don’t know how to operate.

I can’t wait to see it all!